Lindsay Lohan is a terrible role model. But when you’re born into a family that includes Dina “Will-Fuck-for-Gin-at-Applebee’s” Lohan and Michael “I-Just-Hit-That-Bitch-with-a-Bottle” Lohan, you’re pretty much fucked from the moment you popped out of your mama’s sacred place. I would hope that during her coke breaks in between takes she […]

What I really mean is that Megan Fox looks bad. And I’ve only seen three examples of this kind of puffy face: bulimia bloat, which will make your face swell up terribly; domestic violence, which could be possible because the rumor for years has been that David Silver beats her, […]

What’s for dessert? Heaven gives you all the details you need to make your girlfriend skip the ice cream, and go straight for the cum.

“Linsday Lohan to Pose in Playboy” would have been an awesome headline four years ago, before she turned herself into the belle of the trailer park. I wouldn’t fuck her with Magic Johnson’s dick, and it’s practically AIDS-proof. I’m not saying they can’t work their photoshop magic. They made Tara […]

I’ve been a Bree Olson fan for years. She used to be in some gonzo porn that I dug at the time, and she is (for lack of a better term) almost a comedic pornstar. She’s actually funny! Even now if you watch some of the behind-the-scenes stuff on her […]

Hef’s old part-time noodle blower Bridget Marquardt has decided to put her talents (making boners in the young and old alike) to use by creating a line of Halloween costumes. Slutty Halloween costumes. For sluts. Am I making myself clear? There’s a slutty maid, a slutty secretary, something that looks […]