Playboy, the Ultimate Cockblocker

I was going to bring you guys the pics from Playboy’s “Girls of the SEC” November issue to celebrate Football Friday, but Playboy’s reputation for being cockblockers when it comes to sharing pictures precedes them. I can’t blame them–if my magazine rested in the hands of an increasingly senile old sack of balls who was so far gone that he’s signing people like Lindsay “I’ll Suck Yo Dick for a Dolla” Lohan to show off their pussies I’d be real serious about legal issues too, because the printed publication is probably only a few years away from disappearing since anybody, including me (and I’m practically technologically retarded), can find better lookin’ chicks online for free, all day long.
The funniest thing is that not only are these chicks not allowed to share their pictures with anybody, but they’re also heavily monitored online by Playboy’s Twitter account. All the girl’s have restricted accounts, in case they get drunk and post pics and the public see their special nipples. As Kenny Powers would say, Playboy’s got that shit locked down tighter than a little girl’s tuna. Well, I say “FUCK PLAYBOY!” I subscribe to your magazine, and if it wasn’t for the awesome Chuck Palahniuk fiction I wouldn’t bother reading it. Blondes with fake tits and bald pussies are literally less than a dime a dozen, they are FREE motherfuckers!

In the meantime, enjoy 27 minutes of Karissa Shannon (Hef’s busted white-trash ex-girlfriend) fucking a black guy.