I turned 20 today

My mother was in labour for three days, and the third day, upon which I was born, was Easter Sunday. I learned that today, at dinner with my parents. This explains so many miracles that have happened to people in my life: I have the power to heal with a single touch, and guide people out of both spiritual and physical catastrophes. I kind of wish I was the resurrection of Moses instead, because I think he was cooler and he had a burning bush and could just move any lake out of the way which I could make into a career. Or Mohammed because the Islam faith is pimp if you’re a dude and he was a pimp king and shit.

Here’s a porn from my only teen idol, Asa Akira. I used to watch her interviews and I read her book because I could relate to her hornyness. I though that one day, I would become a pornstar too. I find myself subconsciously repeating things she’d imprinted on me in childhood: like when she said she is in love with whoever she has sex with, but only for that moment of fuck. I really feel it. It’s a meditation. It’s like lovingly sponge bathing an old relative: I get the same fuzzy ‘I’m doing something good’ feeling.

That was a lie.